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View Full Version : If Premiership Teams Were Women.........



sportingprofit
9th March 2004, 18:46
Arsenal - Angelina Jolie
Looks good, a bit maverick at times and you know they have the
potential to really screw you over

Aston Villa - Dido
One big hit. Fairly inoffensive really

Birmingham City - Mariah Carey
Occasionally interesting, frequently annoying. Supporters are thick

Blackburn Rovers - Melanie Sykes
Common as muck Lancy, constantly worrying.

Bolton Wanderers - Natalie Imbruglia
Always looks like she might go down but never does

Charlton Athletic - Martine McCutcheon
Chirpy Cockney with the ability to spring a few surprises

Chelsea - Rachel Stevens
Every bit looks good from all angles. But what is she doing with that prick

Everton - Barbara Windsor
Been laughing at those t*ts so long we forget that once upon a time they actually looked quite good

Fulham - Andrea Corr
Not bad to look at but not much of her. Seems a bit awestruck with fame

Leicester City - Patsy Palmer
Generally a bit crap and second rate really, but some people like her

Leeds United - Lisa Scott Lee
Dirty Lee

Liverpool - Sophie Ellis Bextor
Individually all the components look fantastic - just doesn't work
when put together.

Man City - Madonna
Have been big at times - now lost the plot a bit - ageing stars.
Nice new home though

Man United - Jordan
Dominated by t*ts. Screwed by Dwight Yorke. Quite repulsive
really

Middlesborough - Tara Palmer Tompkinson
Can look quite good at the back - but nothing at all up front to
speak of.

Newcastle United - Christina Aguillera
Can look good. Various unsavoury elements though.

Portsmouth - Chrissie Hynde
On the face of it a has-been but you're quite interested in what she's
going to do next

Southampton - Kylie Minogue
Sometimes you feel sorry for them, they’re not huge and you've got a
bit of a soft spot.

Tottenham - Joan Collins
Used to look good, but living on past glories.

Additional one more...

West Ham - Britney Spears
Been threatening to go down for the last few years, but finally did
it this year.

John
9th March 2004, 19:30
:laugh Like it a lot, that's brought a bit of a smile to my face after a shaky day's racing. :)

presto
9th March 2004, 19:37
brilliant :D

Workshy
9th March 2004, 20:10
I can confirm Britney did go down......











the charts. :D

xploit
14th March 2004, 16:50
Man United - Jordan
Dominated by t*ts. Screwed by Dwight Yorke. Quite repulsive really

Oh how true :D

:D xploit :D

manckevin
19th April 2004, 00:23
Just had to adapt that for Super League - brilliant - sheer brilliance :D