This Forum...............

[sparkyminer]

is flipping brilliant. :D
Last night. It helped me fix my computer. :)
Tonight. Hamster hunting. :)
Where else can you get that? :D

[Fadetoblack]

hamsterhuntingandPCfixing.com

[TheOldhamWhisper]

hamsterhuntingandPCfixing.com

Now THAT gets you some rep!!! :laugh

[bigcumba]

Yep, that was bloody funny! You should think about becoming a comedian.... :)

[Fadetoblack]

Yep, that was bloody funny! You should think about becoming a comedian.... :)

:laugh

I'm still at it...have yet to be booed off stage and am entering a Comedy Tournament soon... :yikes:

Which reminds me of a funny incident that happened me last week....

We were up in the casino where we play all of our poker tournaments, the place looks pretty inconspicuos from the outside, not exactly like a casino (in fact, it's a poker club, not a casino... :rolleyes: ) Anyway...around the corner from it you'll find a strip club (for a small city we have big ideas)...Anyway...the other night a drunk man came to the door and thinking the poker club was the stripper club he asked the bouncer what was happening tonight. The bouncer replied..

"There's a tournament on"

Drunk man: "Really? How does that work then?"

:laugh :laugh

True story that

[GlosRFC]

pchuntingandhamsterfixing.com would've sounded strange!

[Merlin]

:laugh

I'm still at it...have yet to be booed off stage and am entering a Comedy Tournament soon... :yikes:




Life is a comedy tournament Mate....:yikes:

[andyp]

:laugh

I'm still at it...have yet to be booed off stage and am entering a Comedy Tournament soon... :yikes:

Which reminds me of a funny incident that happened me last week....

We were up in the casino where we play all of our poker tournaments, the place looks pretty inconspicuos from the outside, not exactly like a casino (in fact, it's a poker club, not a casino... :rolleyes: ) Anyway...around the corner from it you'll find a strip club (for a small city we have big ideas)...Anyway...the other night a drunk man came to the door and thinking the poker club was the stripper club he asked the bouncer what was happening tonight. The bouncer replied..

"There's a tournament on"

Drunk man: "Really? How does that work then?"

:laugh :laugh

True story that

boooooooooooooooooooooo, hiss, booooooooooooooooooooooo

:laugh :D

[Fadetoblack]

aww...I thought that was a funny story...

Maybe i told it wrong :doh

[Win2Win]

Maybe you just shouldn't have told it :laugh

[Fadetoblack]

Hmmm, maybe you didn't get it....cause that my friend was top drawer stuff.....comedy gold

[MarcusMel]

Don't get the joke! Bloke is drunk and confused and we are supposed to laugh at him because of his poor confused state!:doh Bit like slipping up on a Banana, could have broke a leg, got badly injured so people laugh! So if I go out and get my hand crushed by a falling ladder you are all going to laugh! no probably not but when the extra bucket lands on my head then you will laugh:D

--------------------Picked this up at the ol work place it does the rounds every now and then.
-----------------------


Please take time to read - - this is funny! Just as a word of explanation, this guy Brian is apparently a commercial saturationdiver
for GlobalDivers out of Louisiana and performs underwater repairs on offshoredrilling rigs.

Below is an e-mail he sent to his sister. Any time you think you
arehaving a bad day at the office, remember this letter....True story.

April, 1998
Just another note from your bottom dwelling brother. Last week I had
a bad day at the office. Before I can tell you what happened to me, I
first must bore you with a few technicalities of my job. As you know my
office lies at the bottom of the sea. I wear a suit to the office. It's
a wetsuit. This time of year the water is quite cool. So what we do to
keep warm is this: We have a diesel powered industrial water heater.

This $20,000 piece of junk sucks the water out of the sea. It heats it to
a delightful temp. It then pumps it down to the diver through a garden
hose which is taped to the air hose. Now this sounds like a damn
good plan, and I've used it several times with no complaints.

What I do, when I get to the bottom and start working, is I take the
hose and stuff it down the back of my neck. This floods my whole suit
with warm water. It's like working in a Jacuzzi.

Everything was going well until all of a sudden, my ass started to itch. So, of course, I scratched it. This only made things worse. Within a few seconds my ass started to burn. I pulled the hose out from my back, but the damage was done.

In agony I realised what had happened. The hot water machine had sucked up a jellyfish and pumped it into my suit. This is even worse than the poison ivy you once had under a cast.

Now I had that hose down my back. I don't have any hair on my back, so the jellyfish couldn't get stuck to my back. My ass was not as fortunate. When I scratched what I thought was an itch, I was actually grinding the jellyfish into my ass. I informed the dive supervisor of my dilemma over the com.

His instructions were unclear due to the fact that he along with 5 other divers were laughing hysterically. Needless to say I aborted the dive. I was instructed to make 3 agonising in-water compression stops totaling 35 minutes before I could come to the surface for my chamber dry decompression.

I got to the surface wearing nothing but my brass helmet. My suit and gear were tied to the bell. When I got on board, the medic, with tears of laughter running down his face, handed me a tube of cream and told me to shove it up my ass when I get in the chamber.

The cream put the fire out, but I couldn't crap for two days because my asshole was swollen shut. I later found out that this could easily have been prevented if the suction hose was placed on the leeward side of the ship.

Anyway, the next time you have a bad day at the office, think of me. Think about how much worse your day would be if you were to shove a jellyfish up your ass. I hope you have no bad days at the office. But if you do, I hope this will make them more tolerable."

[Fadetoblack]

Don't get the joke! Bloke is drunk and confused and we are supposed to laugh at him because of his poor confused state! Bit like slipping up on a Banana, could have broke a leg, got badly injured so people laugh! So if I go out and get my hand crushed by a falling ladder you are all going to laugh! no probably not but when the extra bucket lands on my head then you will laugh

He though the poker club was a strip club and when he asked what was happening there tournament they said there was a tournament on....

Tournament eh? (In a strip club) How does that work?

Ah forget it.... ;fire :D

[MarcusMel]

Its obvious the stripper who gets the most cheers and whistles is the winner:doh. Either that or there is a panel of judges:D

Hmmm: I must stop watching men and moters or channel 5 late at night!!! :laugh

[John]

Don't worry Daz, I got the joke and found it pretty amusing. :D

[Workshy]

I think theres lots of fishing/sarcasm in this thread. Dazzler's intelligence isnt high enough to recognise it :D :laugh

[mathare]

I think theres lots of fishing/sarcasm in this thread.Fishing? I saw the thing about the diver with a jellyfish up his :butthead: but I would hardly say that was about fishing :doh

[Workshy]

Fishing? I saw the thing about the diver with a jellyfish up his :butthead: but I would hardly say that was about fishing :doh

Sounds like a vindaloo, ring stinger :yikes:


(c'mon, someone had to say it!!!)

[Fadetoblack]

I think theres lots of fishing/sarcasm in this thread. Dazzler's intelligence isnt high enough to recognise it :D :laugh

I refuse to recognise it!